Posted by Jemma Breban on 19th December 2011

Following your divorce, it’s natural your ex-partner may eventually meet someone else who becomes a significant part of your children’s lives.

Dealing With Change

If time with your children is limited, you may worry they will spending considerably more time with your ex’s new partner and even come to call him ‘dad.’ The situation is bound to make you feel insecure and is likely to cause feelings of anger, hurt and jealousy. These emotions are unavoidable, but the way you deal with them could determine your relationship with your children in the long-term.

Find an Outlet For Your Emotions

Bottling up your feelings can make you ill, so you need to find a release. Take up a sport, go to the gym or even go for a walk around the block – anything you can do to vent your frustration. You might benefit from talking with someone outside the family such as a friend, counsellor or even your GP. If you can master these difficult emotions you will have more to offer your children when you do see them.

Things To Avoid

A Way Forward

You will always be your children’s father and the arrival of your ex’s new partner gives you an opportunity to strengthen your bond with them further. It is likely that they are feeling unsettled themselves and will need your unconditional love and support.

Make an effort to spend quality time with them and stick to your normal routines when they visit – this can be very reassuring. Go to the park, cook some food together or just go for a walk.


Remember however difficult this is for you, it is most challenging for your children. The best you can offer them is love, commitment and understanding and that way you safeguard your relationship for the future – no matter what.

Would you like to speak to someone? Find out how to get in touch...