For many separated parents, school holidays are a chance to enjoy some special time with the children. If things haven’t gone the way you hoped this half term, perhaps plans changed, tensions rose, or the children felt caught in the middle, it’s okay, you’re not alone, and it’s not too late to make a change for the better.
With the summer holidays just around the corner, now is the perfect time to reflect and prepare. Specialist children Lawyer Amelia Davey shares are some practical steps to help you build a more positive experience next time around.
Take time to consider what didn’t work
If the half term didn’t feel calm or cooperative, take a moment to think about what didn’t work. Was there a misunderstanding over dates or pick-ups? Were your children unsettled or unsure about the plans? Identifying the pinch points can help you move forward more positively next time.
Don’t leave planning school holiday child contact until the last minute
Planning ahead makes all the difference. Start the conversation with your co-parent early – even if it feels difficult. Getting dates in the diary for the summer holidays now gives everyone time to prepare, especially the children. Try using a shared calendar or parenting app to keep track of the arrangements.
Keep your children’s interest at the heart
When making holiday plans, keep your child’s needs at the heart of the conversation. They’ll benefit most from a holiday that feels calm, predictable, and free from conflict. If they’re old enough, you might gently involve them in discussions about how they’d like to spend their time.
If you’re stuck try mediation
If communicating directly isn’t working, you don’t have to do it alone. Mediation is a constructive way to work through disagreements with the help of a trained professional. Many parents find that just having a neutral space to talk things through can make all the difference.
Know your legal position – Especially for holidays abroad
If you’re planning to travel abroad in the summer:
- If you’re named in a Child Arrangements Order (CAO) as the parent the child lives with, you can take your child abroad for up to 28 days without the other parent’s consent – but it’s still best practice to inform them.
- If you’re not named as the resident parent, or there’s no CAO in place, you’ll need permission from everyone with Parental Responsibility.
If consent is refused, you can apply to the court for a Specific Issue Order to allow the trip. Likewise, if you’re worried the other parent is going to take the children abroad, without your consent, you can apply for a Prohibited Steps Order.
Progress is good even if contact isn’t perfect
Parenting after separation is never simple, especially around holidays. But each experience is a chance to learn and improve. Being willing to communicate, compromise, and focus on your child’s wellbeing can turn things around. In my experience many separated parents reach an amicable agreement about what time the children will spend with each parent during school holidays.
If you need support with the legalities around school holiday child contact then please do get in touch with our specialist children lawyers.
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