Can mediation help when my marriage fails?
The failure of a marriage can be attributed to many factors, such as the influence of previous relationships that we have experienced, the relationship of our parents, our own self-worth and the capacity to change.
Most couples want to put the past behind them and have the divorce or separation dealt with as quickly as possible.
However, the concept of a quickie divorce owes more to myth than reality. Once you bring children and finances into the process, any divorce and separation can become complicated and expensive – especially if your divorce becomes uncontrollable.
Mediation can help speed up the process and allow you to talk through your differences in confidence with an independent neutral professional.
What are the benefits of mediation?
- Mediation is not about getting back together. It is not a substitute for legal advice. It is however the chance to resolve any issues by communicating and making joint decisions rather than having decisions made by a Judge who does not know either of you or your family circumstances.
- If there are children, a bitter and resentful divorce or separation can seriously harm their mental health. Sadly, one in four children will live through their parents’ divorce before they are 16 years old and approximately 60% of fathers will lose contact with their children within 3 years of divorcing or separating. Sometimes, affected children are less likely to succeed at school and more likely to suffer from insecurity and anxiety.
- Where disputes arise over children and/or finances, mediation may be an appropriate choice; it can save time and money.
- Mediation can have a positive effect on the future for your family. You will be demonstrating to your children that you can still work things out together and resolve a dispute in a sensible manner.
As parents, you have a responsibility to protect your children as much as possible from the damaging effect of your divorce. Mediation sets a good foundation for building an amicable relationship for the future.
Rachel Buckley heads up the Divorce and Finance team. She can be contacted on 01392 457155 or [email protected]
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